Friday, January 7, 2011

Jesus in the Canned Goods Aisle

I was pushing my cart past the stewed tomatoes in the A&P this morning (remembering my mother's warning of 10+ years ago that I should always push my cart in the center of said aisle, lest a wayward can of soup fall onto my baby's head), when I heard the telltale "ba-ba!" of a text message arriving.  I grabbed my phone (morbidly afraid that it would be the school's alert system, announcing an early closing due to the 1" of snow we're experiencing this morning).  But it was a message of a kinder, different nature.  Here is an excerpt:

 The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you. Something good will happen to you today, something that you have been waiting to hear. Please do not break. Just 27 Words, "God our Father, walk through my house and take away all my worries and illnesses and please watch over and heal my family in Jesus name, Amen." This prayer is so powerful. Pass this to 12 people including me. A blessing is coming to you in the form of a new job (YES!), a house, health, marriage, or financially. Do not break or ask questions. This is a test. Does God come first in your life? If so, stop what you're doing and send it to 12 people now. Watch what He does.

All this in a 1 1/4 by 1" Samsung screen. From someone I don't know in Bloomfield, NJ (thank you Reverse Look-up).

So I thought about my day thus far, standing there amongst the Ragu and the Ronzoni, and realized that I had already been blessed.  I didn't have a single fight with Thing 2 as he got ready for school, I fit into a pair of pants that I had no business fitting into and I had had the time to watch a very entertaining episode of Millionnaire Matchmaker I had DVRed. 

And more blessings were yet to come!  I saved $33.06 on a $116.94 bill (nearly 30%).  I have dinner all planned for the next two nights (this is a bigger deal than you might think).  And this was even without forwarding on the prayer.

So, since I don't pray to Jesus and I'm not going to be using this prayer, I thought I would forward it on to those of you who can use it.  From text message to blog.  It's a techno-spiritual world out there.  Wishing you everything you wish for yourselves.


  1. I'm sure the sender had all good intentions, but HOW RUDE on so many levels, including the suggestion that, unless you cooperate, clearly god is not important in your life (and, for that matter, that you are not "blessed" if god is not important in your life)! Arggggh. Sanctimonious.

  2. pretty much agree with mary beth...i deleted a god botherer from my facebook yesterday, i know lots of them ,friend nd family,with no problems,but this one was just a bit too...end of days and its all the debauched homosexuals delete lol

  3. Sounds more like a fortune cookie than a blessing. I don't like it when people treat God like a vending machine: stick in your quarter, and get a candy bar.