Tuesday, April 5, 2011
I was thrilled when Charlie Sheen of Two and a Half Vials of Tiger Blood responded to my recent request for an interview. (Of course, he didn't respond with any words that I can print on this family site, but at least I got a response).
Charlie and I met via Skype between his stops in Detroit and Chicago during his Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not An Option tour. I found him to be tall, dark-haired and male...even when I asked the difficult questions.
How has your life changed since you went ballistic, embarrassed your family, alienated your fan and bought a new bowling shirt?
It has been amazing. I'm in it for the strike, got a spare, and rolling down the alley. Going for commerce, dude. Yeah.
Do you think that your recent problems have any connection to the fact that your given middle name is Irwin?
No. Do you think your recent problems have any connection to the fact that you're a Barry Manilow fan?
Um, we were talking about you, Chuck. You know, Adonis DNA and the fact that your life is so much more bitchin' than mine?
On a personal note, if I may, where do you find your goddesses?
Why? Are you interested in applying?
(Me: Thinking Skype connection must be a little bit fuzzy) Uh, no thanks Charlie. Now, in doing research for this interview, I learned that in 1990 you "accidentally" shot your then fiancee, Kelly Preston, in the arm and that she broke off the engagement soon after. Comments?
It was an accident. I swear, I was trying to cut off her head and the gun just ...went... off.
So, what's next? Do your think you'll ever go back to Two and a Half Men?
NO WAY! Okay, maybe. If they put a sign on my dressing room door that says "Warlock."