For a long time, I was satisfied. The closeness, the warmth, the snuggling. The furtive nuzzles. The knowledge that, in the wee, small hours of the morning, there was always a warm body keeping me safe, loving me.
And then one night last week, I finally got really sick of trying to sleep with one cat draped over my head and the other cat resting heavily on my bladder.
So I'm ready to banish both cats from the bedroom. As with most things in my life, this isn't as simple as it sounds. I can't close the door to the bedroom, because Thing 2 gets "scared" if our door is closed. So I can stay awake until he's asleep and then close the door -- but this often isn't until 11. I can shut the cats behind the door in the guest/sewing/hamster room, but I don't want to add "crapper" to the multitude of functions that room satisfies.
The only other solution I can think of is a dog. Cats are afraid of dogs, aren't they? So if a dog was sleeping in our bed....