Thursday, October 14, 2010

It's Chile Down There. So Wear a Poncho.

It sounds as though the 33 Chilean miners who have been trapped at the bottom of a 2,200 foot mine are on the cusp of being rescued. Underground for two months, they have been the focus of worldwide interest and intense media scrutiny, as well as book and movie offers too numerous to count.

Don't you sometimes wish you could take an extended vacation underground? I bet miner Yonni Barrios is glad to be a half a mile underground, given that, as reported by the New York Post (the "source"):

"While waiting for trapped miner Yonni Barrios, his wife Marta Salinas made an unpleasant discovery: Barrios's mistress, Susanna Valanzuela, was also hanging around the mine site waiting to see her man, the same man, surface. "This woman has no legitimacy!" hissed Salinas. "We are in love!" replied Valenzuela. "I'll wait for him!"There are a number of reasons why, if it were me trapped so far underground, I might consider staying there:

1. Carl Paladino

2. Elementary school dioramas

3. Jeggings

4. My upcoming gynecological check-up

5. Lindsay Lohan

The idea of giving up control and letting the world unfold around me often has a delicious appeal! I remember my envy when Martha Stewart went to minimum security prison for insider trading, spending her days in prison garb and giving knitting and crocheting lessons to the other inmates. (America's needleworkers went crazy for the crocheted poncho that she wore upon her release -- a gift from one of "the girls" she met while in the slammer.)

Admit it, what could be better than not having to decide what to wear everyday, eating meals in the cafeteria and sitting around knitting with the girls?

In fact, it might even be better than spelunking in Chile.

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